face mess.

i am trying to think of a way to get excited about shaving. i am unable to buy my old shaving soap locally anymore and i always wait too long to drag a razor over my face and then it hurts.

i am fully aware that i will never be able to grow a non-pathetic looking beard. i can't even manage to wear stubble well! why is it that i have NO FUCKING DESIRE TO SHAVE? let's see...

1. i guess number one must be that i am waaaay afraid that my face is going to break out after i "do the deed." when i was in high school, i would shave in the morning and then by lunch i could feel my face painful with acne cysts and ingrown hairs. what's cooler than a crappy beard? acne breakouts on 30 year olds.

2. the soap thing. i used to buy burmashave cakes from albertson's. they smell great, last for a fair amount of time (unless you start using them as hand soap...) and cost $1.29. ready for the goocher? no longer made. no website. searching google produces a bunch of faux-vintage signs and some jackass on ebay trying to sell two cakes for nine bucks. ebarbershop is selling a set of three for $14.95 but who is buying it at these prices? possibly me soon. i guess if i am blowing money on $20 lotion from keihl's and $15 on the most modestly priced but convincingly effective eye cream, i guess i could buy the best shaving soap for my face so i don't look like a unshaved creep.

3. mary. wha, wha, what?!? i remember she once told me that stubbly was kinda cute. is this license to not shave for a week straight? hardly. there is a threshold i cross in about 48 hours that turns "stubbly cute" into "unhygenically busted-looking." i can only blame mary partially for this, actually...

4. i am lazy.

take your pick of my reasons. i think it is a combination of all of these. that being said, i still need to shave more often.